I’m still baffled as to why the Kardashian’s are famous.

I don’t even want to analyze it. I’ll let Kramer do the talking.

Though I must say, I did see this article on The Blemish that crossed my feed over on the Facebooks, which I have to say is pretty damn believable. “They settled on Alex Roldan, Kris Jenner’s hairdresser from her I Love My Friends music video. They put their photos side by side and allege Khloe’s middle name, Alexandra, is an ode to Alex and then they yelled, “See?! See?! I f**king told you so!””.

So if you care, there’s that. I’m going with part-time Lou Ferrigno, Alex Roldan.

We’re just going to keep rolling the unfunny news and totally bum out your Wednesday cause we’re doing a totally awesome job at that today.

This video is from 2004. It was recently uploaded to YouTube by, we’re assuming, the abused daughter in the video. We’re also assuming that she’s in a safe place now, far far away from her f*cked up father. You’re going to hear about this story and the developments a lot this week.

We here at 8BitDad would like to be the first to welcome The Bieb’s into fatherhood. And say whaaaaaaaat – we beat Perez to the punch on this?

Well, it’s not an easy role, being a father. Well at first it is, you know, since the woman – or girl in this case – has to do all the work, being pregnant and ultimately – again, in this case – keeping it quiet for 12 months.

So before shocking allegations are revealed, I’d like to just say that this dude is 17. AND a pisces. The f*cker shares my birthday of March 1st. I know for a FACT that Bieber is in some serious sh*t with this chick because after reading their “brief” uh.. 30 seconds? Really, dude? Damn.

Okay, I’m google’ing this girl, Mariah Yeater… and… great. All I come up with is Rumer Willis. Gross.

Anyways, you’re in for some serious Conrad Murray competition for some ‘bloids, as we like to call them ’round these parts, so have a merry f*cking Christmas. Cause that’s how long it’s gonna take for all this sh*t to be sorted out.

For the record, I’m gonna call this one as truth. I’m not betting, but I will go on record today, November 1st, saying that this dude will have to get a blood test and he will ultimately end up on Maury.

I’m never wrong.

Monday afternoon, Antonio Diaz Chacon took off work early to go home and be with his family. His washing machine was broken, so he went down the block to his relative’s house to do his laundry. It was there that Chacon saw a man throwing a girl into a van as a neighbor screamed for help.

Chacon, a mechanic and father of two did what most people wouldn’t – he went after the van. Chacon jumped in his pickup truck and went after the blue van – and when the van crashed and the perp jumped out and ran off, Chacon approached the girl and told her that he’d take her home.

Phillip Garcia, 29 year old scumbag, returned to his wrecked van and drove off. He was later caught by police, who hopefully were fairly rough with their cuffing, detaining and handling of Garcia. When police found Garcia, they also found a glove, a Leatherman tool, tie-down straps. They also found packing tape and more tie-down straps hidden under a rock, just 25 feet from where the van was parked.

Chacon said it was easy to make the decision to chase the van, because of his own daughters – one 7 years old and the other, 5 months old.

This dude’s a great father, a rad neighbor, and a really stand-up dude. Would you have done the same thing that Chacon did if you saw a kidnapping happening?

Sauce: Washington Post