You’d think this is one of those unwritten rules of Father’s Day, but evidently, we need to write it:

Do not buy your father Heelys for Father’s Day.

I mean, we’re talkin’ about shoes with wheels in them. Think about your dad. Now, think about your dad with a broken tailbone. Bleeding out of his anus. I don’t know if that’s what happens when you break your tailbone, but I can imagine bloody anus is somewhere in the symptom list.

If you don’t want to be changing your dad’s bedpan for the week after Father’s Day, stay away from Heelys, no matter how cool the below press release makes it sound.

I would, however, love a pair for myself if anyone’s got some size 13W they’re not using.

Sauce: BusinessWire

Yahoo Sports has been a source of fatherhood articles for us lately, if that gives you a scary idea of the article pool we’re working with. But hey, it’s Friday and a holiday weekend…

Yahoo contributor Mark Paul presents for your consideration, the “best” father-son combos in the MLB.

I don’t know much about baseball, but I don’t know why the Ripken family didn’t make it on the list. I was pretty into Cal Ripken Jr. back when I was in little league. On the other hand, I pretty much used Sandy Alomar’s baseball cards to practice throwing cards like Gambit.

Sauce: Yahoo Sports