Adam Mansbach’s forthcoming storybook is decidedly not for kids. It articulates the feelings of frustration that every parent experiences when their young child refuses to go to sleep, with allegedly hilarious results. I judge this book by its cover, but here is a (slightly edited) excerpt:

The cats nestle close to their kittens now.
The lambs have laid down with the sheep.
You’re cozy and warm in your bed, my dear
Please go the f**k to sleep.

Sauce: Amazon

Just in case you forgot – there’s only FIVE DAYS LEFT to enter to win the blue snakebyte MiniMote courtesy of 8BitDad and Sunflex!

Entering is easy – all you’ve got to do is go to the review and leave a comment!

Winner will be chosen MIDNIGHT PST, April 30th – which, will actually be May 1st!

Click this link to get to the review, and leave a comment – it’s that simple!

Maine proposed bill LD 1046 is troublesome. The bill, basically, gives the operator of a bathroom or shower facility the power to decide “who” can use it. If this sounds confusing, it is. I know I’m missing something.

Where things get difficult is with transgendered “users.” While the bill has bathroom operators choosing who uses the facility based on “biological sex” – that is, whether you’re biologically male or female, transgendered people generally identify with (and can very well be all but genetically) the other gender.

Joanne Herman, a transgender advocate – and transgendered herself – wrote about it on Huffington Post. She talks about a father, Wayne Maines – who was very vocal against the bill.

The takeaway comes in the second-to-last paragraph of the Wayne Maines’ letter. He says: “She came to me crying and asked, ‘Daddy what did I do wrong? Daddy please fix this?’ That is what dads do — we fix things. I had to break her heart and say, ‘You have not done anything wrong sweetie, but Mommy and I do not know how to fix this, but we will try.’”

As a father, you’re a fixer. The world, I think we can all agree, is broken. We’re the protectors of our children, and when our kids hurt, we fix it. Sometimes this means doing it the hard way – and sometimes this means knowing when to quit. A bunch of on-and-off-topic discussion after the break.

A recent series of reports released by the Federal Trade Commission reveals that retailers do an excellent job of preventing minors from purchasing M-rated video games. In fact, children hired by the FTC to purchase inappropriate games were less successful than children trying to purchase R-rated films or music bearing a Parental Advisory Label. This information may be arriving at a critical time in the court case focused on the criminalization of sales of M-rated video games to minors. Here’s a question: If stores don’t sell M-rated games to underage kids, how are so many of them getting their hands on these games and, more importantly, annoying me during multiplayer matches? The answer is simple, parents are buying M-rated titles for their children because either they don’t think that the content is inappropriate, or they believe that their child is mature enough to handle the content depicted in M-rated games. The FTC’s data indicate that most parents understand the ratings system for video games, so the next time that you’re going crazy because your nine-year-old teammate in Call of Duty multiplayer won’t stop singing Lady Gaga’s “Poker Face” into his mic, remember that his parents are to blame.

Sauce: The Federal Trade Commission

Recently, DadLabs talked to Andrea Doucet about her book Do Men Mother? And aside from the normal (but important) conversation about how women feel about seeing men at the park, Doucet brings up a great point about people seeking “50/50 marriages.” Doucet asks what exactly “50/50″ would be – and says that there are specific and different things that men and women want to do for leisure and chores. In that respect, the key is having a symmetry in the marriage, not trying to cut things in half.

This is an important idea Doucet touches upon – so often, we’re worried about cutting things exactly in half so they’re 50/50 that we don’t create a symmetry in the relationship. If you hate doing laundry but your wife doesn’t, clearly you value the task differently, and thus, it’s hard to quantify exactly what you owe your wife to make up for her doing the laundry. Is it enough to just fold the laundry? Do you need to mow the lawn?

Also, buy Doucet’s book so she can afford a better webcam. She was absolutely drowning in jaggies and pixelshitz.

What, you’ve never heard of heteropaternal superfecundation? While it’s common in stray dogs, it’s generally only experienced in human women that are particularly – how you sayyyyy – slutty.

Heteropaternal superfecundation occurs when, well, a woman has sex with two men within a short amount of time, conceiving babies from both men’s sperm.

And there’s no better place to find women like that than on Maury.

Our buddies over at Digital Shepherds know the value in father-daughter relationships. Founder of the non-profit, Tshaka Armstrong, suggests that one of the best ways a father can influence a daughter is by listening.

And the best way to listen, of course, is over tea.

Armstrong has suggested this before – and people seemed to like the idea. So, Armstrong is taking it to the next level – he’s throwing the word “National” into the mix.

Here’s a gem from last week…and coincidentally, also from the logic of the last 100 years: children whose parents are alcoholics are more likely to be alcoholics.

You hear that? It’s the echo of 1 million facepalms.

The “important” finding in the Denmark study and survey was that daughters seemed to inherit the alcoholism more than sons.

The study will appear in the July issue of Alcoholism: Clinical and Experimental Research.

Sauce: Business Week